Pretending that everything is alright is not okay et al. I am speechless. I know it seems so obvious but to confess that I am hurting is more than killing myself so mean. To realized that you're not yet changed when all I hope was a new you is hard to accept. I thought you're different, I thought all you know is being with me, to keep me fancy, to keep all the promises (where got promise), to learn what I HATE the most. Forgive myself for being emotional. And plus to realized I am just new girl that you knew is hurting more. To know myself for keep a distance to what you really like to do. In fact, I AM THE NEW GIRL YOU KNEW, I BETTER OFF MY SHOES FROM CONTROLLING WHAT YOU WANNA DO. I know and I know from the beginning. What's build you today is something you learn from past. Something that you always do during the past time. Something that you shared with your loved one long time ago. And again, I am a new girl that should ashamed of myself to deny your attitude. Your attitude that hurting. A lot. I wonder if I'd chosed wrong but I don't wanna lose you. Please forgive me to being so annoyed. I am overthinking. Every girls does. But when you hiding someting out of my knowledge makes me doubt. I know we got nothing to always be truthful to each other. But I am just curious to know. And when I know, it is hurt. When I am hurt, I keep distance. When I keep distance, I am overthinking. When I am overthinking, I have no trust. But for sure I know the fact. The fact to keep this to myself. To keep the fact that I am the new girl you just ever knew.
